I just woke up from a very vivid dream that SEEMED to last all night! I don't know whether to be grateful or disturbed. During the dream I kept waking up and falling back asleep and each time a different girl was in my bed. I'll be honest and admit that two of them are girls I've actually had sex with before. You can stop reading now if you think this post is going somewhere because I can't promise you that there is a point. I will say, however, that I'm a little disturbed by the dream. You see I'm genuinely trying to make sure I don't repeat the mistakes of my past, yet I feel myself being tempted to be worse than ever.

My numbers are low and I wasn't THAT bad, by most people's standards, but my OWN conscience is bruised by my failure to wait 'til marriage to give my prized penis away! (The story about my stolen virginity will be in a future post) It's obvious to me that SEX (because of how good it feels) is a gift from God. However, HE never intended for us to be CONTROLLED by anything but HIS spirit, which is LOVE. I, like many men, have a really strong desire to see, hear, smell, taste, and touch naked women. Nevertheless the bible and my personal history have proven that whatever you yield yourself to becomes your master. It is virtually impossible to repeatedly engage in a behavior without giving it some authority over your life.

BACK TO THE DREAM... I believe dreams are either products of our subconscious, messages from God, or devices of our spiritual enemy. I'll place this one in all three categories. My subconscious has Lil' Wayne's "Every Girl" on repeat; God's message to me is to keep my penis in my pants; and the devil is using my own lusts to tempt me! I'm happy to report that I ANTicipate winning this battle as I step closer to God, move farther and farther away from groupies and ignore the devil. I'm about to go and talk with HIM for a few minutes about this and other issues, ask and thank HIM for help, and then maybe I'll come back and post something else. Either way, ANTicipate a better life family! All things are possible!